i don't think i've ever felt this lonely before. i don't usually feel lonely, but i do. i feel like i have no friends - i know i do but i feel like i really don't, or at least not any close friends with the exception of ashmonkey - we'll always be friends until we're little old viejitas. it's weird with college - this transition that leaves you in a situation with friends back home and friends at school. you leave behind all these "close friends" with promises to keep in touch but what were once a couple of phone calls a week become a phone call maybe once a month, an IM, a comment on an LJ or a facebook message. and then you make all these "close friends" at college but then summer rolls along and you don't talk to them at all, maybe a quick email on Brownmail here and there saying 'how's your life' or a facebook message, and then that's it. and being away from home leaves me here with 15 strangers who are wonderful but in the end they are strangers with whom i am only sharing 7 weeks of my life - can i call them friends? i guess here we're all we've got, and i'm close to one of the girls - Taylor from Dartmouth. thank goodness because if not i would be miserable. but in the end, the only people i really talk to about my life and whatnot are my mom and ash. and over the phone of course. which sucks. at least i have the two of them to talk to. i don't know what i would do if ash and i weren't friends anymore, it would be extremely lonely considering my "best friend" from Brown no longer fits under that title. this sounds so incredibly emo - i'll get over it.

3 more weeks here. 14 days of teaching + graduation day for my little campers. and the routine continues: work, gym, eat, sleep and go out on weekends. wake up by 7 AM, sleep by 11 PM. if this is what the rest of life is like then damn i'm not looking forward to it. i am having fun here though but working is definitely overrrated, at least working full-time. but then again there are those perks of enjoying your money and going shopping like i did yesterday. got myself a nifty little jean skirt, red top, 2 polo shirts, snazzy black sandals, and 3 pairs of chandelier earrings. it was a nice little shopping spree. yesterday was payday. taxes suck my big butt. $50 out of my paycheck. $50 = 5 hours with my 11 kids. not cool U.S. government, not cool.

last night: dance party in the boys' suite resulted in bob & kailin naked (Brown boys, of course). bob was so crunk he fell down the stairs. he's alive. bob & kailin also danced naked in the rain. it was thundering and lightning. yep. these are the things that happen here in Baltimore on the weekends. i was grinded on by Omar, Kailin & Walter - what more could i ask for?